There was considerable excitement in the shed the other day when our Twitter account hit 2,000 likes. Most of them approvingly, probably.
We’re most grateful, especially considering we are actually here by default. I wont go into the gory details or the offer from Mary and Tom to come and bathe Nev. Suffice to say TUFAC is about (in no particular order), football, Antifascism, travel, beer, socialism and brandalism. That we like what we do and that you do too, makes us very happy and humbled.
Yesterday we donated £150 to the International Brigade Memorial Trust (IBMT) from the sales of the Donald Trump Antifa Poster. It’s been a hard year for the IBMT because they had to cancel a number of their usually excellent events. At a time when educating people about what Antifascism really is has become of paramount importance, we cannot allow the voice that is the IBMT to in any way go unheard or muffled.
Educate and Agitate
We had somewhat of a chuckle when we saw Matthew Collins from Hope not hate on the television late last week. Collins was interviewed by Good Moaning Britain in an office filled with Antifascist paraphernalia (including our !No Pasaran scarves), so it did beg the question as to how long it would be before he was accused of inciting terrorism by some red-faced gammon.
Well, it turns out the outrage was not from the likes of Tommy Robinson or his many aggravated haemorrhoids- but from people who should probably have known better!
Part of the hilarity has been covered by the Metro Newspaper. The book that caused the outrage, ‘Nazi Terrorist’ can normally be bought here, but as the people there are currently locked down, we contacted Collins and he has agreed to supply us with two free and signed copies of the book. So, the first two people to contact us and ask for one will receive a signed copy (UK only, I’m afraid).
Sex up your shed, office or terrace.
When will we/will we ever get back to football? Football, as you well know, is nothing without people near freezing to death pitch side for the pleasure of little reward or gratification. Saturdays have blurred into every other day and the Friday night anticipation of wasting a fair chunk of the much longed after and deserved weekend on football, is a feeling achingly absent. Like Coronation Street.
In England they finally threw in the towel on leagues one and two yesterday, meaning many fans will miss out on the last day of the season’s elation, pain or grateful disinterest in the fortunes of their most favourite or hated football team.
Even cheating at Football Manager on the laptop has lost its shine. For seasoned alcoholics football fanatics like ourselves, who like to experience footballing misery across the entire continent of Europe, the Friday night TUFAC zoom quiz, watching Nev scoff Jaffa cakes while quizzing us on how many covered seats there are at Piestfield Stadium is no substitute for traveling with Nev, across Europe, to far flung football matches while he tells us how many covered seats there are at Priestfield Stadium.
In May the TUFAC Travel & Pregnancy Advisory sub committee met to discuss where we would be venturing after lock down. We still have unfinished business and RyanAir vouchers to attend to.
A smorgasbord of football and alcohol
Cliftonville, Livorno, Ath Bilbao, San Sebastian, Alloa, St Pauli, Rayo Vallecano, Cork City, Exeter City, Wrexham, and Hibernian were all thrown into the onion ring. Comrade Tom, a veteran of evening visits to rural pastures reminded the committee there is also a host of Belgium and German lower league teams that allow alcohol consumption pitch side to further investigate.
The sub committee concluded that although we made a start on Germany with regular St Pauli and a Union Berlin visit, we need to increase three or fourfold more spirited and drunken roll/fall down the terraces to add to a list that includes among others we recommend, SV Babelsberg, Altona 93 and Tennis Borussia (there was literally an after-match disco in a shed in the woods after one match we attended there). If one of our loyal followers could confirm the availability of Bounty Bars and Jaffa Cakes in the close proximity of those other football grounds’ we’d be grateful. The Hotel and Divorce Committee are waiting to hear your suggestions.
I forgot to mention the flag…
Afternoon drinking isn’t just bad for your bladder, it blunts your memory. Before I went on a long and wistful trip down memory lane about getting bladdered and snogging a German outside a phone booth in Babelsberg, I was meant to mention we have a flag for you.
I have no bastard idea why this pic is the wrong way around and not horizontal like I wanted it to be. Anyway, check out the floor at Nev’s house.
The idea is that you imagine yourself draping that flag over some statue of some bastard slaver or scab before you kick it over. Because we love you, simply enter FLEGPROTEST at the check out for 15% off. Offer expires on Sunday.
Beer Carrier
This bag type thing is great for picking up cans and bottles from the off license and ferrying them home or to the shed. Apparently they carry 10 litres, but it is best if you don’t actually pour your booze into them, but keep it in their can or bottle until you get the booze back to the house/shed. Entering BEERBAG at the checkout gets you 15% off until Sunday.
Marxism and a Big Mac
Nev makes great T-shirts, but his photography is shite. At my wedding he managed to capture my wife snogging the wrong man! What a idiot. Anyway, this McDonalds/Karl Marx T-shirt looks a lot better than he has captured it here. Entering BIGKARL at the check out will get you 15% off until Sunday.
TUFAC in the news..
I’m sure you’ve all heard the story about the Italian newspaper that covered our trip to Italy two years ago by sending a reporter to report about the bar we drank dry and tidied up. The tight git didn’t even buy us a straightner. These days we prefer other people to get us in the news- and there is always a prize for doing so. Last week television pundit Kevin Maguire clearly had a TUFAC face cover on display in his home. Looks like he also has some old copies of the Yellow Pages, too. Rather than send Mr Maguire a thank you, we would like this woman to get in touch. She was captured by the Chronicle in the north east of England at a protest, wearing one of our face covers. Not only does that make her socially responsible, it makes her our hero of the week. If someone can identify her, the Trade Union & Alcohol Committee would like to send her a small something.
And Finally…
It’s socialism or barbarism. Be kind to each other and your neighbours. Kick over the statues as you go.
